5 things I hate about...

Empire Total War

To kick us off, I'm going to moan lyrical over the latest instalment in this franchise. So, in no particular order, here we go:

1. Friendly unit AI in battles. If history has taught us anything, it's that no matter how much you tell them to fire at will, line infantry will invariably stand around picking their noses with bayonets having several ounces of lead shot pumped at them repeatedly, with nothing so much as a harsh word thrown in retaliation. 'Concerned: Losing slightly' Yes, me too.

2. Time to play a game. Like the great dynasties of yore, at the rate it takes to proceed through even a short Grand Campaign, I'll have to pass on the mantle of stewardship to my sons and them to theirs if my family is ever going to see a campaign through. Real-time strategy? You're not kidding.

3. Thugees. Yes I know the term is accurate but DAMN, every time I hear the advisor chick's voice saying it I almost snort a lungful of my soup. For some reason I have images of 50-Cent's crew roaming around the sub-continent in their pimped-out carts terrorising rice farmers and cotton weavers. Don't be a menace to South Asia while drinking your lhassi in the jungle.

4. Enemy AI on the campaign map. Watching enemy manoeuvres sometimes feels like you are watching two very stupid dogs chase each other around, waving their tails like these virtual muppets wave their flags with seemingly no sense of purpose to it at all. One unit will march from point A to point B, about face and march to point C. Meanwhile, another, perhaps slightly cleverer muppet (but who really knows) will start from point C and march straight to point A. The end result? Nothing has changed except a wasted turn of movement and the player sitting there giggling uncontrollably as she ponders which region to next meander over and swallow up into her empire.

5. Difficulty. A vegetablised donkey could prolapse onto a board made of solid stupid and that dubious deposit could swallow a couple of valium, play this on hardest setting and STILL easily mince to victory. Hell, I could even play this on the hardest setting and mince to victory (although as point 1 above suggests, probably only using good old auto-resolve (or should I say auto-win by the way but that's technically sneaking in thing number 6 that I hate)). This is also pretty much only theory as due to point 2 above, I've not got a spare year to actually find out. If conquering the world was this easy, America would have done it by now.

*offers pinch of salt*

Got any more?

(((Note this is crossposted from my new blog over at GAX. I'll keep crossposting for a wee while even though it's also kinda doing that automagically. )))

It's a Sin, alright!

A little bit of a rant today. I've been going through a spate of watching films with the director's commentary on, including the considerably entertaining Mel Gibson on Apocalypto, the somewhat less than entertaining Ridley Scott on Bladerunner and the mildly entertaining Michael Davis on Shoot 'Em Up. I'm quite a fan of picking up special/collector's/limited editions of movies I like and exploring the behind the scenes features that you pay the premium for.

This was definitely at the forefront of my mind when I picked up the "Recut and Extended" steelbook edition of Sin City a few years ago now. To my surprise and outrage, when I put in the first disc the other night to watch the film with Robert Rodriguez's commentary I discovered that the package had shipped with the basic one disc edition masquerading as disc 1. WTF!? Not a commentary or special feature in sight. Fair enough it's taken me this long to notice but nevertheless I am not a happy bunny. Has anyone else got the Recut and Extended version and also found this to be the case? I wonder if a whole batch shipped this way or if I was just unfortunate to get a bit of an idiot serving me in HMV...

Bastards.

Mini-rant

What the hell have they done to the Follower box? It looks terrible now. So much so in fact that I got rid of it altogether. It used to be so unobtrusive and now it's this big ugly box emblazoned with GoogleFriend Connect logo or somesuch. Urrgh. Not nice at all.

That is all, for now. Later today I'll post my review of Invaders Must Die. I bet you cant wait...

Golf Tango Foxtrot Oscars

I'm not going to talk about the Oscars, much. Not a fan. Slumdog won everything. Heath Ledger got his gong(if there's even been a surer bet I don't know what it is). That's all I have to say on that really. Well done Danny Boyle. Superb director, so he is.

So I was lying in bed last night and thinking things over (as I sometimes do) with regards to what I'm going to next. It's coming up to the 18 month mark that I've been in my current job and it's usually round about that time that I find myself somewhere between utterly hating it and mightily bored and in need of a new challenge. Perhaps somewhat encouragingly, it seems different this time. I dont hate my job. Far from it. I actually get a reasonable amount of satisfaction from it. Sure, I work for a big ass corporation that makes obscene profits every year but at least here I am working on something more important than lining shareholders pockets. The work I do has a genuine impact on the education of the young people of this country and that's something I take immense personal pleasure in. It's the same feeling I got when I worked for the NHS. A sense of social contribution that was completely absent when I worked for the mortgage company, or the casino, or any of the other companies I've been employed by before. The people I work with are great. The atmosphere in the office is by far and away the best I've experienced and the environment and conditions I work under are a lot better than I've ever had before. I'm also well compensated for the work I do and I know that I am lucky compared to the majority. There's a major restructuring going on that might be opening some doors to bigger and better things (well, bigger and better pay at least). So why am I questioning whether I want to stay beyond the end of my contract or not? Is it just that 18-month itch I appear to possess? Answers on a postcard (or comment, if you prefer).

Perhaps the answers lie away from Reading.

So, self-indulgent rambling aside, back to the important matters. Like Motherwell FC. Somehow or other, we managed a point at home to Celtic in a 1-1 draw that by all accounts was far from a spectacle of the beautiful game. The Fir Park pitch is a coo field. Something of an embarrassment if I'm being honest. We cant even blame Gretna this season. Hamilton play just a couple of miles away so we also cant lay the blame at the feet of localised weather conditions either. Nevertheless, the 90 minute game of hoof it and chase produced a relatively entertaining match yesterday and despite my prediction of us taking a doing, the 'Well were good value for our point. A valuable point indeed, as we moved above the Hibees. Anything you get off the Old Firm is a bonus as you dont really expect anyone else to take points from them and yesterdays draw made it 8 unbeaten in the League, a feat not even equalled by Rangers this season. (Dundee Utd went 8, and Celtic went 12 earlier in the season, for your information). If we can extend that run to 12 or more then top 6 should be safely in the bag and a push for one of the two Europa League places could make for a lively final quarter of the season. Can't wait!

Todays video is another great song by Jonathan Coulton, of Skullcrusher Mountain and Still Alive (The Portal end song) fame:

The Dress-Down-Day Rant

When I first started working where i am right now every Friday was a dress down day. I'm sure you are familiar with the concept. You get to wear what you like basically. More recently, however, a new fortnightly regime has been introduced to much grumbling in the ranks. I just can't understand it frankly. The reason given was some crock about important visitors who might randomly drop in and every second friday was the most likely time for these appearances. Yeah, sure. There's clearly a gravitation towards abandoning dress down day altogether and only strength of feeling amongst the rank and file has prevented it from happening in a more immediate fashion already.

In an office that is not customer-facing why do we even bother getting suited and booted anyway? Do you get more done if you're in a suit? I'd like to see evidence that supports that. If I'm sitting in comfortable clothes I think I tend to be in a better mood and accordingly get more done, but that could just be my psychological interpretation. I love weeks that have a dress down day in them. It's almost like a 4 day week. Hmmm. Perhaps this is the problem management has with it. Maybe people do have an attitude that a dress down day is somehow an "easier" day. One thing I just thought of is that if every day was a casual clothes day then that once a fortnight wouldn't be quite so special now would it?! Every week would FEEL like a 5 day week, albeit in casual clothes :) I guess you cant win.

Oh, and I'll finish today with a rather humorous video. Makes me so proud to be from Glasgow...